Everyone talks about how high the divorce rate is. And it really is sad that, statistically, marriages have less than a 50% chance of remaining intact.
I was thinking...Of the many individuals who are no longer married, how many of them really still love their former spouse? I personally believe that number is pretty high.
The love is still there, but the marriage has fallen apart.
If this is true, I would have to conclude that the marriage failed due to a lack of interpersonal or relationship skills--not a lack of love.
I'm learning from my 11 years of marriage that for a marriage to work, then the individuals have to work. They need certain skills, knowledge, and maturity to make the PARTNERSHIP of marriage work. It is not going to be a successful marriage simply because the two love each other.
Unfortunately, these principles and skills are not typically taught. And too often, irreparable damage is done before the couple can figure out HOW to build a successful relationship.
Marriage is a union that requires life-long learning, listening, and growing...because love alone just isn't enough.
2 comments:
Great post and very true. It takes a lot from both sides to make a marriage work.
If one truly loves their spouse, they should be willing to employ (or learn if not already equipped with) the "other" strategies you named...learning, listening, true understanding, etc.
well, without sounding personal, list some of the things that you have had to do in the past to make love/marriage, from your standpoint work.
Saying that with work it will work is not enough.
People need pointers.
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