In the last entry, A Little Advice for a Frustrated Wife, there was considerable commentary on the role of pastors as counselors. Most people took the position that pastors generally are NOT equipped to counsel.
Here's one comment that sums up this perspective,
"seek the counsel of a social worker trained to deal with marital issues. I have sought counseling of Pastors before but sometimes they don't get to the root of the psychological or emotional issues that need to be addressed."
Are most pastors equipped to properly handle counseling in marital affairs?
Should they be?
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5 comments:
I think that pastors already try to do too much for people instead of teaching people to do for themselves. And they cant be experts in everything. How could one person give advice on marriage, raising children, succeeding at work, financial management, political activity, social responsibility, etc.---and still be an effective SPIRITUAL LEADER. Pastors should have a network of "experts" in each of those areas that have the time and background to properly counsel.
I TOTALLY AGREE W/ THE FIRST COMMENT. THE PASTOR HAS SO MANY THINGS TO DO IN AND OUTSIDE THE CHURCH, AND EXPECTING HIM TO BE AN EXPERT AT EVERYTHING IS JUST CRAZY.I DON'T THINK THAT A PASTOR SHOULD BE LEFT ALONE TO COUNSEL AND REACH OUT TO HIS PEOPLE, YET MOST I KNOW ARE.SOMETIMES WE SEEM TO FORGET THAT THE PASTOR IS JUST AS HUMAN AS WE ARE AND THEY HAVE FAMILY'S, BILLS, AND ISSUES TO RESOLVE AS WELL.GROWING UP I HAD FIRST HAND EXPERIANCE OF THAT,BEING THE SON OF A WELL KNOWN PASTOR. SOMETIMES IF PEOPLE OVER WORK THERE PASTOR OR THE PASTOR OVER EXTENDS HIM OR HERSELF, IT COULD LEAVE THE SON OR DAUGHTER AT HOME ALONE, WONDERING IF THERE PARENT IS CHOOSING THE CHURCH OVER THEM.IF YOU REALLY THINK ABOUT IT, THAT'S A PROBLEM FOR MANY KIDS THESE DAYS. THAT ALONE PUSHED ME AND MY FATHER APART, AND THAT'S SOMETHING THAT TOOK US UNTIL I WAS ABOUT 22 YEARS OF AGE TO RESOLVE. IMAGE THAT.......
I agree with the two comments posted.
I've never felt the need to gain counsel from a pastor, however if I had marital issues I would not take counsel from a pastor who has not had a successful marriage relationship.
I think that a pastor can be equipped to counsel on all aspects of a person's life, if he has had the proper training. Meaning, if he is a licensed counselor or has gone through specific trainings that dealt with some of these life issues. I agree that a pastor can't do it all, but I feel somwhat uncomfortable to be at a church where I feel that I could not seek guidance from my spirtual leader or a minister who has been TRAINED and designated to assist the pastor with attending to the needs of the people. While I know that most pastors are not equipped to give advice about finances, children, relationships, etc., I think they should be or have staff that are equipped. Exodus 18:13-27, tells the story of how Moses would sit day and night counseling the people with various matters. Moses' father-in-law saw this and told Moses that he would wear himself and the people out by doing that day and night without help. This was too great of a task for one person to carry. So he suggested Moses find "able men, such that fear God, men of truth, hating covetousness, and place such over them..." Exodus 18:21. I know that many of us have been tainted by inadequate advice from pastors, ministers and even some missionaries; but I still believe that these people should be able to help with such matters. I think it is our job to expect more excellence from our leaders by letting them know we need help. If they can't provide it then they should be able to send us to someone that can. Many pastors are into the title more than into the role as being the servant of the and for the people. Maybe part of the problem is trying to find a pastor that has a heart for God and his people and not a pastor who sings well, looks good and is out to win a popularity contest.
I feel that being part of an effective ministry demands some kind of counselling knowall on the pastors part.
I know that he himself is human, but there are hurting people with in the walls of the church, and if the world reaches them first, you have lost a soul.
Pastoring is a committment to get souls saved and ready for the kingdom. This includes many facets of life, and believe it or not, counselling is one of those facets.
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